Full Contact Curling

Rick Mercer is probably Canada’s most successful political TV funnyman. His previous show, This Hour Has 22 Minutes, has had some fun with curling over the years... from spoofing a widely-panned CCA commercial to Raj Binder’s brilliant appearance at the 2005 Olympic Trials... which featured a flummoxed Wayne Middaugh, Jeff Stoughton, Shawn Adams and Russ Howard.

Now, the Rick Mercer Report has produced a curling item... a mock commercial spot for the mock CBC-TV show Full Contact Curling, which we now present for your viewing pleasure.


And there’s more. There’s always more...

• This poor fellow from Massachusetts looks like he was the victim of Full Contact Curling... and the debacle ocurred on his second stone of two back-to-back games! We love his opening line: “Let it never be said I’m not completely honest, even when it involves my total humiliation.”

• Well, looks like the Mississauga News figured out that Ontario provincial competitor Chrissy Cadorin is a calendar girl ...

• Meanwhile, the Ontario STOH blog has some funny stuff posted. First, a good zinger was dropped by one of the competitors at the team meeting. Second, they’ve posted a request for info on Jenn Hanna’s choice of pants. Finally, one match from Tuesday night was interrupted by a “Beer Time Out”, we kid you not. Okay, the writer actually called it a “bar” time out (look under “9th end”) but all we can think about is... KEGGER! ...

• Calgary’s Shannon Kleibrink is fuelled by the fire and Al Cameron handicaps the Alberta STOH field ...

• Here’s a preview of the Sask women’s titleshoot now underway – new format and all – in Swift Current. Clearly, the “Miller” sisters have a lot on their minds these days ...

• And here we have a preview of Team Rob Lobel, set to begin play at Monday’s TSC Stores Tankard Ontario men’s championship ...

• DID YOU KNOW: that an Ottawa heart attack victim was saved at the RCMP curling club? ...

• Speaking of Ottawa curling, we see that Joe Pavia now has his very own mugshot... woot!

• They’ll be Jam Pail Curling in Smithers, B.C. next month ...

• Damned snow... no backyard curling for you!

• Riverview, NB will buy a corporate package for the massive Ford Worlds in Moncton (good choice, guys) ...

• Here’s a cute kiddie curling pic... with the requesite helmet, of course ...

• The story of Scotland’s Fife Curling Trust and it’s million-pound plan for a new rink in Cupar has hit the mainstream news, but of course curling fans have long been informed, courtesy of Curling Today ...

• Clubs across PEI are going hard with The Dominion Curling Club Championship... is your club involved?

• Team Vic Peters is done for the year, in a mild blow-up fashion ...

• Geez guys, that house is a mess... and we LOVE IT ...

• And finally, congrats to Zach, an avowed “LifeGetter” from Binghamton, New York.

Feeding off a rather interesting conclusion – namely, that “when it comes to a lot of cool things, America is lame and nobody participates” – Zach and his brother made the long trek to Rochester, NY for a day of open house curling.

Make sure you click on the link above. Nice story and pics, Zach. Welcome aboard.

And just like that, slowly but surely, curling’s gradual conquest of the United States continues its march ...