Brier: Blog Babes say Buh-Bye

by Margo Weber and Dalene Heck

[Margo says:]

Buh-Bye.

When my old friend gk contacted me to see if I’d be interested in blogging it up at the Brier, I was, like, ‘Hells Yeah!’

A whole week at the Saddledome goofing around and showering the curling world with my crazy opinions?!

Alas, reality hits. I have a couple of young ones at home and this was not possible. Enter my good friend Dalene Heck who has been nothing short of fantastic. Definitely the Brier Media Rookie of the Year! I’ll never forget Crotch Cam, Stalkergate or the crazy games we played with our new media friends.

I have managed to go to a few games, hit the Patch in style (Oh my GAWD) and send in a post now and then. I’ve met people from across the country, reconnected with old friends, ate too many chicken fingers and had way too much to drink.

gk, hope we didn’t trash up your site too much. You kinda asked for it. xoxo


[Dalene says:]

Peace. Out!

And there you have it. Despite a final substitution when Jeff Stoughton ousted Glenn Howard in Saturday’s semi-final, the 2009 Tim Hortons Brier ended as many suspected it would – with a dominating win by Alberta’s Kevin Martin. What a thrill to be at the Saddledome and watch Martin’s foursome earn their second consecutive Brier, and in front of an excited hometown crowd!

A few weeks ago, if you would have asked me what I’d be doing the week of the Brier, I would have said that I'd be catching most of the games on TV while lounging in my giant-baby-one-piece-footed-pink-camouflage-fleece-pajamas. I never would have expected to meet so many great people (including a new BFF!), take so many pictures of crotches, become a stalker, become a stalkee, do an interview in the CBC Radio studios or help pick the All-Star team.

It’s been an incredibly fun week, that ended with a weekend of exciting curling moments. While I am sad to see it all come to an end, there are many things that I am looking forward to: sleep, spending time with hubby and the kitties, detoxification, sleep, reintroducing vegetables to my diet as a replacement for pocket dawgs, sleep, catching up on all my recorded TV shows, getting back on the treadmill, and sssssllllleeeeeppppp!

Thanks to everyone who helped make this experience what it was, especially my hawt partner in crime, Margo Weber! And to our hubbies for putting up with it all (XOXO).

Brier: I say Johnny, you say Mo

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – I say Johnny, you say Mo!

Johnny!

Mo!

Johnny!

Mo!

What a crowd!

Given the complete blowout that was the final game, I’m happy to say that I stuck it out and watched Alberta’s Kevin Martin, John Morris, Marc Kennedy and Ben Hebert get to enjoy their historic Brier victory with such amazing hometown support.

And let's give a big Hells Yeah to Jeff Stoughton and his Manitoba foursome for the class act that they were in that final game. Jeff’s token spin-o-rama gave the fans one more chance to stand on their feet and salute their tremendous efforts at the end of this week.

Brier: Sorry, Jeff

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Game time, and time for my final pre-game blogpost of the 2009 Tim Hortons Brier.

Jim Brown of the Calgary Eyeopener asked me on Friday morning if I thought it was possible for any team to knock Alberta off of their record setting performance. At the time, even when there were still four other exceptional teams in the mix, I confidently answered in the negative. Kevin + John + Marc + Benny = Unbelievably Unbeatable.

My tune has not changed. Martin has won his last six matchups against Stoughton, and that winning streak isn’t going to end here either.

Since my interview on Friday, Alberta squeaked out another one from Ontario, placing them directly in the final. While they only won the 1 vs 2 game by an inch on Kevin’s final draw, I truly believe that in today's final, they will find a way to again be on the right side of that inch. They will continue doing what they have done for the past 25 games – they will always find a way to win.

This is unfortunate for Manitoba’s Jeff Stoughton, who has hit his stride in the last three games. After running the house on Quebec in the tiebreaker, Stoughton continued his own winning streak with wins over Newfoundland and then Ontario to place the Bisons in today’s final.

While these games were largely won on the strength of Stoughton’s red hot shooting (three missed semifinal draws aside!) he was also afforded many an opportunity by his opponents. Brad Gushue’s Newfoundland foursome took too long to get their heads in the game and Glenn Howard curled his worst game of the tournament.

These sorts of opportunities will not be loosely offered up by team Alberta, if at all. Where Stoughton and third Kevin Park have been streaky in their game performances, Alberta has been extremely consistent with nary a blemish to their record. If the Martin foursome let the Brier Tankard slip out of their hands due to a less than stellar performance, it will be nothing short of a catastrophic upset.

Jeff, thanks for making the playoffs exciting after a relatively dull week of curling. Sorry that you won’t be able to see it through.

Brier: Media scrumming

CALGARY – In this Facebook photo snapped by New Brunswick fan Rebecca Tremblay, we can see the Brier media scrum which followed the epic Glenn Howard versus Russ Howard (and Steve Howard) battle on Tuesday. Click to zoom in (a little).

A gaggle of major curling poobahs are indicated by number. Plus the key on-ice protagonists.

At number eight is the shoo-in for Brier Media Rookie of The Year – if they had such an award – Dalene Heck of The Curling News.

Brier Patch IV: Keep your pants on, friend

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – More Patch pics tomorrow, but for now, another from last night... which feels like last week already.

Oh Dougie! Your hard work and determination to get onto this blog did not go unnoticed. Nice to see that you took “Argyle Friday” to a whole new level ...

Brier Patch II: Stalker confrontation

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – To my pleasant surprise, all-star hottie third James Grattan (left) did not run for the hills when he learned who I was. He was aware of his “hottie” status thanks to skip Russ Howard, who actually showed him this blog!

James even offered to keep the Crotch Cam alive by promising to send other pictures, for apparently team New Brunswick has more stylin’ belt buckles in their arsenal.

And yes, that’s me in the middle. Pleased to meet ’cha!

Brier: There Is Beer

[Editor’s Note: Superstar TCN Blogger Dalene Heck will appear on CBC Radio’s Calgary Eyeopener with host Jim Brown at approximately 6:22 am local time tomorrow, Friday March 13. Dalene will talk about the Tim Hortons Brier, set up the playoff picture and possibly describe her Keith’s Patch adventures from the previous evening. Hoo-wah. Tune in to 99.1 FM, 1010 AM or via the internet from anywhere ... ]

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Thursday night at the Brier. A weird buzz overall. Craziness. Last-minute wrestling for a playoff spot. Standing ovations from the crowd (CCA photo by Michael Burns) to those who are headed home. It’s electric.

And, of course, there is beer.

Every day, the event daily Tankard Times churns out profiles on different players. I can’t help but question whether some of the players allow their friends to complete their forms for fun, or perhaps they have ingested a few wobbly pops before putting pen to paper?

Here are a few that have gotten me wondering…

• Nova Scotia third Bruce Lohnes’ nickname is apparently Juicy Brucey. I’m not sure I’d be advertising that little fun fact myself.

• New Brunswick third James Grattan described himself as “sexy”. While I can’t disagree with him (Hello? All star HOT third!) I never pegged him as the narcissistic type.

• The British Columbia team obviously had fun with their profiles. Skip Sean Geall’s profile stated that he loves curling because “there is beer”. Second Kevin Reckseidler described himself as “classy, gassy and sassy”, while lead Mark Olson is “huggable and kissable”. However, third Brent Pierce apparently wasn’t a part of this game as his profile is lacking some pizzazz!

• When asked why he loves curling, Jamie Koe of The Territories responded with: “Two words, The Patch”. I have to say that I believe my good friend JK completed his profile with all honesty. That is the JK we know and love.

PS: This will officially be my last mention of James Grattan. I can smell the restraining order…

Brier: All-Star voting? Moi?

by Margo Weber

CALGARY – We have a SAY in this stuff?

I learned yesterday that fellow blogger Dalene Heck and I actually have a SAY in who will be on the Brier All-Star team.

Yep. The real one. Not the All-Star Hottie Team. Not the Sense of Ha-Ha Team. Not even the Best Belt Buckle Team. But indeed the real ‘You Can Curl and Should Be Awarded for it’ Team.

You see, the media get to vote on the All Stars. And, can you believe it, we are the media. Ha! Take that, players! Instead of the hardworking people out on the ice voting for their peers, we – the media – get to once again pass our judgement on the curling world. Yay for us!

We need to have our votes in by tonight and I’m super stoked.

I hope that there is no repeat of the Scotties fiasco, where the first and second All-Star teams were actually announced backwards. Both in the presentation at the arena, and for TV, The BC back end of Marla Mallett and Grace MacInnes were shown as first team All-Stars instead of second team. I was like WHAT!? Anyways, total error. Phew!

So, how is it possible that this is how the All-Stars are chosen? Someone enlighten me. Is this some sort of reward for the reporters, a slap on the back, if you will, for a job well done as we clog our arteries with arena food and spend way too much time away from our families? Either way... I’ll take it. I feel like kind-of a VIP. Ha!

Whatever the reason is, I plan not to waste my opportunity to help reward the entertainers we have been watching all week. I will review relevant information. Haircuts will not be used. Belt buckles will be unimportant.

I will use stats. I will pay more attention. Sweeping, judging, line calling, timely shotmaking and perceived team chemistry contribution may enter the picture. In the end, the guys with the best plus/minus will likely get my vote.

I vow to at no time use my hottie team as a reference. I vow to not drink and vote. And I vow to avoid the beloved media bench after posting this article. Except for you, Al Cameron. I will binocular you from my other seats, as per usual.

Wish me luck.

Editor’s Note: Following Margo’s nice words toward Al Cameron, we have joyfully lifted this photo from the Calgary Herald Brier webpages, located here. And a sweet photo it is, from shooter Dean Bicknell.

Brier: Picking to win, Day 6

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Can you smell what the Rockies are cooking?

Oatmeal, that’s what’s cooking. Plain, boring, blah oatmeal. Which pretty much describes the curling that has gone on at the Saddledome through Draw 14.

Thank goodness for Glenn Howard and The Shot (and Russ Howard and The Swing), or there would be very little to be excited about thus far. Let's take another look at some event statistic to tell the story:

• The average points between winners and losers is still hovering around four.

• How about this for another stat: out of 54 total games, only eight have come down to last rock, and only one of those has gone an extra end.

I have high hopes for today, the final draw of the round robin. A lot of these games mean a lot of things to a lot of players battling it out for the playoffs.

While no one has seemed to be able to even test the dominance of Team Alberta (their average points over their opponents is almost five), at least we have seen some weakness in the armor of Ontario, via Quebec’s win yesterday along with close calls against Saskatchewan and the Territories.

No matter for Ontario as far as standings go – they are safe in their quest for the playoffs – but it gives a glimmer of hope to fans who are rooting for a little more drama in their Brier.

No one likes to be able to guess the ending of a movie when they are only three quarters of the way through!

And how do our Pros figure that the round robin will finish off? Click the graphic above to find out!

Brier: $1,000 fines

TORONTO (Yes, Not Calgary) – Yesterday, Margo Weber pointed out the Dalene Heck scoop on Russ Howard The Broom-Bashing Maniac.

And the TCN Blog has another scoop for you today.

To preface, we point you once again to the Al Cameron story on the Russbash, and his reveal that a very naughty Brad Gushue will be paying a $150 fine – to the Sandra Schmirler Foundation – for saying bad things in his horrific loss to Ontario.

Brad actually said “Hit the guard, Gawddurnit” after third Mark Nichols gassed his peel, which was the third Newfie gakk of the 10th end.

We also direct you to this piece by the Canadian Press, which points out that bad boy Jeff Stoughton got an initial $1,000 fine back in the 2006 Brier – for accumulating offenses – which was eventually whittled down to some $250 or so.

Sorry, media boys. Your chump change amounts of athlete cash payments no longer register. Here’s our reveal.

The Canadian Curling Association is not fooling around. These boys, one and all, were read the riot act prior to the tournament and long before Russ could wind up for his tomahawk, BOOM! BANG! Both Gushue and Stoughton were fined $1,000, just like that.

Goosh was fined for the previously mentioned “Gawddurnit” and, while we haven’t yet heard what Stoughton’s offense was... suffice to say that sometimes Stoughton is just, well, Stoughton.

Russ may have received his notice already, or it might be coming today, but chances are he will get smacked. We shall see if the zebras take it easy on the living legend.

For you Saddledome observers: if you think you’ve spotted a chargeable offense, keep your eyes peeled to the carpet after the matches, where the officials gather. This is apparently when the notes are compared, and decisions are made.

For you TSN observers: sorry, you are S.O.L.

The CCA doesn’t release this info and has no intention of releasing this info. Unless, of course, this blogpost provokes some action on that front.

So put that in your pipe and smoke it, Media Benchers!

BOOM! BANG! CHA-CHING!

–––

UPDATE: There is flak coming back about the fines, with some Bench Boys insisting that official word on the fines is indeed similar to past years – $250 or so.

We like our sources, but the investigation continues ...

Brier: The Shot

by Dalene Heck
TSN graphic composite by Anil Mungal

CALGARY – Here’s what the people are saying about The Shot. Yes, that shot.

Click the above graphic to zoom in!

We’ll start with the athletes and then move onto the public... and some of them via Facebook!


“An angle-raise, in-off double and stick it and throw your arms in the air and run around like an idiot. It was a one-in-a-million.”
– Glenn Howard

“I’m really sorry I’m the guy who set him up to play it.”
– Joel Jordison

“Collectively we weren’t our best. I let the boys down, it was my worst game of the week and somehow miracles happen.”
– Glenn Howard

“Call it an angle-raise double re-direct.”
– Richard Hart

“Makes me want to lose some hair and grow two feet.”
– Cheryl Bernard (Pro Picker, Calgary)

“It was a pretty epic shot.”
– Tara Runquist (Alberta fan)

“What a moment...
Wouldn’t it have been fantastic to see that shot happen in the final for the championship?!?! Sure... but it is unlikely that Ontario’s opponent in the final would have allowed that moment to happen. I love witnessing great moments and unfortunately this one began with a tactical error by a top-notch team from Saskatchewan.
The real part to focus on however is that all the variables required for that moment to happen... did. The fact that the rocks were positioned perfectly, inviting perfection was appetizing. Then factor in that it was Glenn Howard in the hack. The moment requested greatness and that’s why my arms rose to the air along with Glenn’s.
What a moment...”
– Dean Joanisse (Pro Picker, Vancouver)


And now to the people... via Facebook!


Steven Lobel thinks that the Ice Man no longer owns the best shot in curling. But still the most important.
(Whitby, ONT)

Sebastien Robillard just saw the best curling shot ever! DAMN.
(Montreal, QUE)

Jesse Ruppell says nice shaaaaat!
(Ottawa, ONT)

Brian Chick can’t believe SASK left that for him... it was wired.
(Toronto, ONT)

Darryl Nodwell in/off slash raised triple for the win – wow ...
(London, ONT)

Rich Ashford I call it the Tim Horton’s shot...a double-double!
(Pittsburgh, PA)

Dean Gemmell thinks he just saw about the best shot ever to win a curling game.
(The Curling Show)

Leigh Armstrong is just witnessed the best shot in curling ever! Go Team Ontario!!
(Oakville, ONT)

Earl Andrew Washburn is OMG, craziest curling shot ever! Glenn Howard is God!
(Ottawa, ONT)

Mike Aprile I think he’s insane in the membrane after that shot!
(Whitby, ONT)

Jill Officer is holy s**t, what a shot!
(Winnipeg, MAN)

Brier Hotties

by Dalene Heck and Margo Weber

CALGARY – Fellow blogger Margo and I have been debating for the last few days over whether we are trashy enough to write a post about who our all star “HOT” team is.

We have decided that yes, we are that trashy. Hey, if Joan McCusker can blog about it for CBC last year, then why can’t we?

Here are our picks... which are surprisingly different. Note that our definition of “hot” goes beyond good looks and includes perceived personality, attitude, and in my case, resemblance to a Raging Bull.

Dalene’s All-Stars

Skip – Nova Scotia’s Mark Dacey it is. There’s something to be said for the intense, bad boy vibe he’s got going on.

Third – sorry J Mo. I know other bloggers have previously commented on your “movie star” good looks, but I’ve got a huge star crush on Robert De Niro, which makes my choice for New Brunswick’s James Grattan the only logical one available. See composite image of Bob the Babe and Jimmy The Kid above, and discuss my logic at your whim.

Second – Tough choice between Alberta’s Marc Kennedy and Saskatchewan’s Aryn Schmidt. I think I’m going to have to give the edge to Schmidt because I’ve never been a fan of blondes.

Lead – Gotta go with Ontario’s Craig Savill. I know, I know... first a car, now this. Can you believe it’s only been a couple of years since he wiped out and fell on the Hamilton Brier ice, to much derisive laughter?

Margo’s All-Stars

Skip – Jean Michel Menard, Quebec. He seems like such a nice guy and I tend to like guys with no hair.

Third – John Morris, Alberta. This was a tough one. Honourable mentions go to Jon Solberg of the NWT (er, should that be Yukon?) and Mark Nichols from Newfoundland.

Second – Brent Laing, Ontario. Again, I like the short/no hair. I’m not totally sold on this one. I’d like to demote a few thirds down to second for a week.

Lead – Mark Olson, British Columbia. He’s curling up a storm, which is always kinda hot. And he’s a baby-faced cutie too.

Brier: Picking to win, Day 3

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – And here is where our Pros stand, along with who they are picking to win today at the Tim Hortons Brier. Click to zoom in.

Poor Grandma has taken a few hits in the past few days, and Dean Joanisse is stepping forth as our “Pro of Pros”...

Brier: So much fun I forgot to eat

by Margo Weber

Like seriously.

When I weighed myself this morning I was three pounds lighter than I was yesterday morning. My intake for the day included one large malt, one piece of Hawaiian pizza and about 15 vodka and diet cokes.

Ugh.

So this is my post-patch update. I wish I could tell you I remembered it all. But I can’t… I started off the night playing “flips” with some friends. For those of you not familiar with this game, it’s a Brier Patch favorite.

Four people play odd-man-out coin flipping until there is only one person left. That person buys the round. I played five times and lost four. Do the math, people.

At $6.00 a drink that’s $96.00. My $80.00 budget for the night was no longer sufficient and I found myself at the Patch bank machine in no time. Needless to say, I stopped flipping and starting buying two drinks at a time for myself.

Fellow blogger Dalene Heck and I spent some time with Ontario’s classy Richard Hart (I think I’m coming around to cheering for Team Ontario, ha ha!) We also threw in a couple high fives with Craig Savill who looked like he was having a great time.

And we had a couple minutes to buy Jamie Koe of the Northwest Territories a Bud Light or two... he needed it after yesterday’s 0-2.

I ditched the morning draw in favour of hanging out with my family, but am on site at today’s action. Might make another Patch appearance tonight, although I can pretty much guarantee it will not be a do-over. Ouch.

Patch entertainment tonight? The Ryans, aka three-time Brier champion skip Pat Ryan (photo above) and his hawtie daughter Lynsay Ryan, who is an orginal Women of Curling calendar girl, too.

Brier: Picking to Win

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Get yer Brier picks here! We got Scotty Pfiefer! We got Cheryl Bernard!

We got Grandma!

There are two kinds of picks in the sport of curling. One occurs on the ice and causes mayhem and anger. The other takes places in the days before a big event – like the Tim Hortons Brier – and it involves picking the winners. As in winners of games, champions of the entire event, et cetera.

Lots of “picks” have been made in the media in recent days. Many features have tried to analyze the two major combatants while others allow the players themselves – like Russ Howard – to articulate their own chances at success.

Othrer features seem to diminish Kevin Martin’s chances of repeating, just because the repeat doesn’t happen very often.

Of course, The Curling News features a repeat victory from 51 years ago in our latest issue... have you seen it yet? Anyone know if “Tay” Turnbull has seen it yet?

Research is also a key. Look at the cool Brier features at the National Post “Posted Sports” webpages... with team breakdowns here and this very cool Roadmap Through The 2009 Brier. This kind of stuff can be helpful.

Then, of course, there are media predictions themselves. And here are some from Winnipeg (here and here)... and from Toronto (see the sidebar alongside the main story)... and, of course, from Calgary.

But now... without further hesitation... what do the pros think?

Looking to make a little money on the games this week and need some help with your picks? Well, look no further! We’ve assembled a panel of local experts to assess the field and give their predictions as to who will walk away with a checkmark in the win column for each game. Check back every morning for each day’s picks!

Our esteemed experts are:

Cheryl Bernard – Cheryl has 4 Scotties hearts to her credit, and was Alberta’s representative at the Scotties held in Victoria just last week. Cheryl’s team has also been a dominant force on the Asham World Curling Tour, having placed sixth or higher in each of the last three years.

Dean Joanisse – A former Canadian Junior Champion, Dean has also made two Brier appearances, representing British Columbia in both 2001 and 2007. On Thursday night he managed to squeeze into that ancient World Juniors sweater – that’s right, sweater! – for the ceremonial first rock at the World Juniors now underway in Vancouver, his hometown.

Kevin Koe – Kevin is arguably one of the best Canadian curlers that has never competed in a Brier. Instead, he’ll have to settle for the $150,000-plus that his team has won on the Tour in only the last two years.

Scott Pfiefer – Five-time Brier champion, four-time World Champion, a couple of Canadian Junior titles, a few hundred thousand dollars won with Team Ferbey… need I say more?

My Grandma – That’s right folks. I can’t think of any other person in the world who has watched more curling then my Grandma, and boy, does she have an opinion! I’m throwing my support behind her picks, and if she happens to win me some money this week, then I might finally forgive her for the time she bet against me in junior provincials.

Brothers, boyfriends and hometown favourites aside… here are who our panel of experts are picking to win today’s games (see above, click to enlarge)!