Italiano Anniversario Curling

It was a little over a year ago that the Curling Italia website launched itself into the online curling universe.

Congratulations on your one-year anniversary, particularly to founder Renato Negro, who also produces the Curling Torino website and blog.

Italy has maintained a presence on the world curling scene since the 2006 Olympic and Paralympic Winter Games featured curling in Pinerolo. The nation has hosted various global competitions including last April’s World Mixed Doubles Championship in gorgeous Cortina d’Ampezzo, which will also play host to this season’s Capital One World Men’s Curling Championship.

Forza Italia!

Brier: is this the best ever?

Question: could this Brier be on its way to becoming, possibly, the greatest ever?

Some guys named Stoughton and Gushue just crashed the Martin-Howard VIP access-only lounge with a scintillating display of playoff curling (CCA photo by Michael Burns).

High drama came down to a stunning conclusion when Jeff Stoughton, staring down a determined Newfoundland comeback attempt (a deuce in the seventh and then double steals in eight and nine) called and made a wild angle-raise double for two and stuck it for the win... which went to a measurement.

In a reversal of the 2005 Olympic Trials final, in which the Stoughton squad started shaking hands with the Gushues while awaiting for the golden measurement – which confirmed Gushue’s Olympic history-to-be at Turin 2006 – this time it was the Newfoundlanders who offered their hands to the Bisons, while awaiting the results of the measurement.

The Manitobans fired 86 per cent as a team compared to Newfoundland’s 83. Stoughton sizzled at 91 per cent – no doubt earning the famous five-out-of-four bonus on his last throw – while Gushue sizzled only slightly less, at 88 per cent.

The ’Tobans went completely crazy after The Shot (II) was made.

Manitoba now moves on to battle Ontario in tonight’s semifinal.

Hoo-boy! Wotta Brier!

Here’s how the live CurlingZone chat module described the action. Can anyone guess which chatter:

a) entered the chatroom just seconds after The Shot (II)?
b) is not in Calgary?
and
b) is also missing the TV coverage?

[CurlingZone Chat]: Posada has entered at 1:28 pm
[t42] 1:29 pm: They don’t believe it
[t42] 1:29 pm: they are stunned
[Donr] 1:29 pm: measure for win???
[t42] 1:29 pm: Jeff’s face
[Jetboots] 1:29 pm: woo
[t42] 1:29 pm: omg
[Posada] 1:29 pm: What's happening!!!!! Just got here Aiighhh
[t42] 1:29 pm: its mb
[t42] 1:29 pm: but NL would be stupid not to measure
[Donr] 1:29 pm: we hope lol
[Jetboots] 1:29 pm: nice shot
[Posada] 1:29 pm: WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT
[CurlingZone Chat]: hack scruber has entered at 1:29 pm
[Jetboots] 1:30 pm: not over yet
[t42] 1:30 pm: oh my -
[Posada] 1:30 pm: JB - TALK TO ME!!!
[t42] 1:30 pm: shaking hands before measure
[Jetboots] 1:30 pm: yellow
[Donr] 1:30 pm: newfies know
[t42] 1:30 pm: MB take 2 and the game with a long angle double raise take out stick
[Donr] 1:30 pm: wow
[t42] 1:30 pm: yess
[t42] 1:30 pm: That is drama
[Donr] 1:31 pm: was worth the prcie of tsn lol
[sandym] 1:31 pm: helluva shot
[t42] 1:31 pm: Jeff was sick to stomach there from the look on his face - not sure he believed he had done it
[Posada] 1:32 pm: Holy crap
[t42] 1:31 pm: they didn’t sweep it all the way down did they
[t42] 1:31 pm: had to do it on its own
[Donr] 1:31 pm: mb in tough tonight
[Donr] 1:32 pm: might require some more praying to the curling gods
[Posada] 1:33 pm: WHY AM I NOT THERE AIIGGHHARRGH *smash* *bang* *crash* YEEARRGHHHH

Uusis, He Is Mighty

The 2006 Olympic silver medal skip, Markku (M-15) Uusipaavalniemi, has arrived in O’vik (Örnsköldsvik) for the Le Gruyère European Championships. He arrived in silver-plated sleigh pulled by Finnish reindeer and accompanied by a convoy of 200 portable saunas.

Well, no, not quite.

But M-15 is now in Sweden, cheering on the Finnish men’s and women’s teams which are both toiling in the B-Division. And that rather ludicrous paragraph about sleighs and saunas was directly inspired by the rampant online craziness the tech-savvy Finnish people unleashed on the world at the height of Markku Mania in 2006.

It’s great stuff. And very, very weird. Like this one titled Emperor Uusipaavalniemi and the Klingons in peace talks.

And this one, Uusipaavalniemi Industries enter eCurling market, where M-15 “has a unique vision of the future of curling. He believes the next Olympic curling in 2010 will take place on screen rather than on ice. Using modern technology Uusis can streamline logistics and focus on the core business – humiliating Canada using the LAST STONE.”

Then of course there was the infamous Uusis: You Are Mighty webpage which, sadly, doesn’t exist anymore. Too bad, because that one was unbelievably weird.

As the English-born journalist William Moore, who lives in Finland, told us that year:

The You Are Mighty page is simply an indication of the early-adopter computer smarts of the Finns. Markku Uusipaavalniemi is also already being heavily “photoshopped” by the crowd that do that sort of thing. Finns are into technical stuff.

(See mock computer game cover image above)

There was even one quote from a chat room that went something like: “This Uusipaavalniemi guy has been some use after all. I told the kids that Uusis had to keep a night light on by his bed, because the dark was scared of Uusis, and now the kids aren’t scared of the dark any more, because Uusis isn’t.”

Indeed, that one reminds us of the classic Chuck Norris tough-guy jokes, which were then incorporated (of course) by Uusis’ growing legion of fans/jokesters.

Some others we love:

• UIOC takes great leap in basic calculus – “The Uusis Institute of Curling today published their latest endeavor on solving the mysteries of basic calculus...”

• Judgement Day – “Finnish people face the morning of the SHOWDOWN with mixed feelings. Intelligence indicates that the Finnish Curling Force is facing a difficult challenge - the Canadian Curling Army outnumbers the finns a thousand to one. Led by Marshal C.G.E Uusipaavalniemi and armed with STONES and BROOMS the thousand fFnnish curling enthusiasts face a million Canadians...”

• Definition of Uusis – “Renowned for his piercing stare and accuracy. Famous for leading the coveted Curling-Lifestyle.”

• Markku Uusipaavalniemi receives Markku of the Year award - “The award is given on the basis of SHEER AWESOMENESS. It is known around the world and is often compared to the Nobel prizes. ‘Cowabunga!’ comments Uusipaavalniemi. Markku has won each time the prizes have been awarded. Go Uusis.”

• Markku performs hostile takeover of Ferrari S.p.A by accident – “Earlier this morning there was unfortunate mishap in Italy. The Finnish Olympic curling team, lead by ‘Massimo’ Uusipaavalniemi, were conducting some undercover training to avoid Canadian spies. Even the GREATEST PEOPLE EVER sometimes make mistakes and this was the day for Uusipaavalniemi: Markku made the mistake of confusing a RED Ferrari Enzo sportscar at FULL SPEED for a RED Canadian curler. His last stone tore the Ferrari in half...”

Anyway...

M-15 is a very politically-correct politician these days, so he’s probably happy to see much of the online madness slowly disappearing from the world wide web. To be replaced, of course, by his own very political website.

And as far as we know, M-15 still owns the curling club which he partially financed and built prior to his 2006 success. And because of this he would really, really like to see the Finnish men, in particular, make it back to the Olympic Games in 2010.

The odds are against them, but the odds were against Uusis back in the fall of 2005, too (look for “Two incredible stories to tell”). In similar fashion, Kalle Kiiskinen’s team needs to make it all the way out of the Euro B-Division to challenge Sweden in a best-of-three for the final spot at the Ford Worlds in March... and then they have to do really well in Moncton to qualify for Vancouver.

But as Uusis proved almost three years ago, anything is possible... when You Are Mighty!


And some more ...

• Speaking of Finland, this curling feature is a decent read ...

• Speaking of the ECC 08, this is the local Allehanda interviewing Anette Norberg (in Swedish) ...

• Here be a YouTube video on construction of the 2010 curling venue, called Vancouver Olympic Centre ...

• Say what? Jim Bender wonders if Mixed Doubles “could kill curling” ...

• This curling column by Steve Buist calls attention to skimpy playdown signups (what else is new?) and an endorsement of Curling Etcetera ...

• Jumpin’ Joe Pavia also endorses the book in this column, plus the newish Granite 2 curling computer game, which is making a welcome return to the public eye... er, computer mouse ...

• Here’s a curling primer from a place we haven’t heard of before: Wenatchee, Washington ...

• DID YOU KNOW: that stones from a former Ottawa-area club have ended up in North Carolina? Anyone care to guess the name of the now defunct Ottawa-area club?

• 70-year-old Ontarian Tom Howat is off to Scotland ...

• And finally, this reporter tried curling, and is in a world of hurt as a result. Respect! (And try it again sometime!)

Wonder Kid Curling

It’s all about the kids. And the Olympics.

Canadian Olympic TV viewers have been delighted by the new commercial spots for Wonder Bread, a sponsor of both the Canadian Olympic team in Beijing and the Vancouver 2010 Olympic Winter Games overall.

Wonder, a Weston Bakeries brand, has a Beijing 2008 online campaign but chose the winter sports theme for its TV spots, which features tiny tykes attempting to ski, skate, bobsleigh and... you guessed it, throw curling stones (above, click to zoom in).

Brilliant move by Weston, and their agency, Round Table Advertising. The little ones are impossibly cute, as you can see by this link. You can also see the spot here, plus the :15-second all-curling version.

Cuteness sells. And we’re buying, particularly when we see two youngsters sliding rocks around amid slips and slides.

The tykes are hired actors (but of course) and the spot was shot last November. Turns out the “stones” are actually ice buckets that were partially filled with sand, glued shut and then painted to resemble real curling stones. VANOC and the Canadian Curling Association even gave their blessing to the new “rocks”.

Er... wouldn’t it have been easier to just call Asham?

Curling has its own :15-second vignette, while the link above showcases all sports in a :60-second spot.

“It’s a little different to see winter sports during the summer Olympics,” said Weston’s Lisa Dahl. And as we said earlier, that’s brilliant.

Here’s Round Table Creative Director Brent Peterson:

Wonder Bread is the favourite bread of Canadian children, and through Weston Bakeries, is an Official Supplier to the 2010 Vancouver Olympic and Paralympic Winter Games. This inspired us to show Canada that it is never too early to start dreaming. We thought it would be charming and entertaining to watch tomorrow's athletes as they discover, learn (and fumble through) their chosen sport.


And still with kids, both big and small...

• “Young people aren’t watching curling anymore,” says John Bernards, executive director of the International Association of Skateboard Companies. Bah Humbug, John. What–Ever. Get Bent, or whatever boarders are saying these days. You Gnarly Chode ...

• Sounds like reigning world junior curling champion Eve Muirhead of Scotland is also one heck of a golfer ...

• From curling’s favourite big kid: 2006 Olympic champ Jamie Korab has posted a behind-the-scenes video from his Italian experience ...

• For the kid in all of us: here’s a peek at a car racing video game featuring “curling” – in this one you eject your driver through the window and onto a curling target. Er, okay ...

• Turns out former Scottish world curling champ and current Brit Olympic team bigwig Mike Hay is in Beijing, after first going to Macao ...

• And two Canadian curling coaches are also in Beijing, Janet Arnott (of Team Jennifer Jones) and Scott Taylor (from Team Glenn Howard). This is part of a Canadian Olympic Committee “secret plan” to familiarize potential 2010 team mebers and coaches with the whole Olympic hoo-hah. Scott reports exclusively for The Curling News:

13 hour flight over was good. The new Beijing airport is fantastic. Road travel was easy using the special lane for Olympic vehicles. The sun is up but obscured by haze. Hot and humid. Off to the Olympic Village this morning.

Slow going on this BlackBerry.

What we have seen of Beijing is beautiful and clean. The people are very friendly. Many of them speak English, which makes it easy for us.

Our first full day kept us busy. We spent most of the day at the Athlete’s Village after we traded in our passports for one of the coveted accreditations. Security is tighter than at some airports. It boggles the mind to comprehend the time, effort, planning and organizing that must go into a facility that houses and feeds 10,000 athletes and 4,000 support staff. We had lunch in a more quaint setting that seats 6,000.

Our athletes are well looked after. The support staff have setup facilities to help them prepare and recover. It was great to see that many athletes have their country’s flag hanging from their balcony. The huge Canadian flag that had been smuggled into many previous closing ceremonies made it obvious where our athletes are located.

Our next stop was Canada Olympic House. It provides many services for the family and friends of our athletes. Fortunately for us we were considered friends – hey, we’re curlers! – and got the royal treatment.

Jet-lag is decreasing. We shouldn't fall asleep during the next day’s session.

Media day! We visited the International Broadcast Centre (IBC). We found out firsthand that you can’t get anywhere if your passport does not match the info they have on file. The half of the media centre that we saw is massive. It’s unbelievable how many media people are here. It can be a challenge for the athletes to make time for the media but how would their story get told without them?

With great anticipation we went to the Canada-USA women’s baseball game. You can’t get in if you have a bottle of water with you – just like boarding a plane. Canada took a 1-0 lead against the favoured USA in the bottom half of the first inning. Then the air cleared and the rain started. Watching the grounds crew cover the infield was entertaining. After we were soaked, raincoats were handed out to everyone. Our agenda did not allow us to wait. As we drove away on the bus the rain cover was being pulled off to resume play. My dream of seeing Olympic athletes in action has been fulfilled. Turns out the game was eventually called off, and our women's team will have a double-header tomorrow.

Back at the Canadian Performance Centre we got to hear from Canadian head coaches about how they help their athletes prepare for their Olympic performance. We took a tour of the Centre and outfitting areas. We had a dinner meeting tonight to cap off our 13-hour day... and it’s still raining!