Trials All-Star Hotties

by Margo Weber

EDMONTON – Come on. You read the blog mayhem from the Calgary Brier, right?

You know I had to "go there" eventually, right?

Okay, here they are... the long awaited All Star Hottie Teams at these here Tim Hortons Canadian (Olympic) Curling Trials.

I give no explanation for my picks, except for sheer hotness. There is a serious Alberta flavour here, but I did try not to be biased. Remember, there were six Alberta teams in the field...

I caught a lot of heck – Dalene Heck? – for my Brier picks, but I think these choices are, for the most part, obvious. Whatever.

MEN

Fourth – David Nedohin
Third – John Morris
Second – Carter Rycroft
Lead – The farmer from the Dekalb TV commercials. Note: there are two farmers, I’m talking about the scruffy cute one.

WOMEN

Skip – Crystal Webster
Third – Jeanna Schrader
Second – Sheri Singler
Lead – Chelsey Bell

** My husband wants a disclaimer here that his picks are Jennifer Jones, Kim Schneider and Kari MacLean and he thinks I should be playing lead on one of these teams. To THAT I say I’d have to start going to the gym.

Agree with my picks? Disagree? Feel free to discuss!

[CCA photo of Morris by Michael Burns]

Curling casting call: Toronto

Time for another curling casting call... this time for the Toronto area.

Jigsaw Casting Ltd. is looking for male curlers who fit the following characteristics to be featured in an upcoming Tim Hortons Brier print campaign:

• Men between the ages of 30-45 of Caucasian ethnicity
• Must have some curling experience

Those who secure a role in the advertisement will be financially compensated with approximately CDN $750.

Must be available for these key dates:

• Friday, November 6 (20 minute committment only)
• Tuesday November 10

You must book an audition if interested, by emailing the following:

• PHOTOS – head shot and full body shot (candid snapshots will suffice, 100kb max per photo, please put “Curling” in the subject line)

• All primary and secondary contact info

• Brief description of your curling experience, years playing, tournament wins etc.

Questions or concerns: contact Erika at 416-360-0336 x230

2011 Brier to London

The last time the Brier appeared in London, Ontario was the year 1974.

Eddie Werenich, The Wrench, was there, playing second for his future third, Paul Savage. Another legend, Bernie Sparkes, was there... playing third for his future third – and the 2009 world wheelchair champion skip – Jim Armstrong.

Quebec’s Jim Ursel was there; he would win the Brier on home ice three years later.

And, of course, the eventual champions from Alberta were there (screen capture above), skipped by the Friendly Giant: Hec Gervais.

Thirty-five years later, Gervais’ second – the CCA’s Warren Hansen – is no doubt jetting to London for tomorrow’s news conference to announce the return of the Tim Hortons Brier to that city, in March of 2011.

Local media has the advance story here.

The 2010 Tim Hortons Brier returns to Halifax, just a few days following the conclusion of the Vancouver 210 Olympic Winter Games.

Ford World Curling: Farewell

MONCTON – The Moncton Coliseum was full to the rafters Sunday night, and I was able to witness a rather amazing 50th anniversary men’s world championship final.

From my part, I'd like to thank gk for the opportunity to blog from this event. It was a blast!

Kudos for Moncton for the organization: everyone here ensured that the event is a success. Even the nightlife of a relatively small city offered plenty of entertainment throughout the week and I must tell you, those long nights are starting to show.

To quote the three-year-old daughter of a Finnish curling legend: “Mommy... Daddy smells like curling again!”

Thankfully, I’ve got no spouse nor kids waiting at home.

In addition to sleep deprivation and liver poisoning, I will go home with plenty of memories and new friends. After seeing a major curling event in Canada, I’m definitely tempted to come and check out another... perhaps next year’s Tim Hortons Brier in Halifax?

While I was disappointed for my brother Kalle (with me in the photo) and the Finnish team, I know they enjoyed themselves, from the moment they started their training camp in nearby Amherst, Nova Scotia to the final round of drink tokens in Sunday night’s Keith’s Patch.

And now that the week is over, it is also time to announce the winner of our “Hottest Player of Worlds 2009” vote.

Although I felt like an utter and complete bimbo for organizing it, the people in Moncton seemed to enjoy a bit of cheeky fun... and even the local media was happy to feature it to emphasize a different aspect of these big curling events.

When choosing my list of candidates, I consulted the media guys who were happy to help, once they had gotten the “I’m not gay, don’t ask me!” out of their system.

In addition to the voting possibility here at the blog – check out the first six candidates (and comments) here, and the final six candidates here – there was a paper vote available at the arena, and hundreds of ballots were cast.

For starters, all 12 nominated players received votes so there truly is an abundance of hot men in this game!

Also, three other gentlemen outside of our vote had caught the eye of the female spectators, and are nited for the record: Switzerland’s Markus Eggler, French front-ender Jan Ducroz and Scottish third Ewan MacDonald.

The result of the balloting went down to the wire. The difference between the winner and the player who came second was only two votes and our top two hotties hogged more than half of all the votes for themselves.

Ladies and gentlemen, here is your Top 5:

1. Thomas Ulsrud (Norway)
2. John Morris (Canada)
3. David Murdoch (Scotland)
4. Andreas Lang (Germany)
5. Tied: Thomas Dufour (France), Jan Hauser (Switzerand) and Jiri Snitil (Czech Republic).

Thank you Moncton... and farewell!

The Curling News: April 2009 issue

The final issue of the 52nd season of The Curling News has been sent to subscribers, so all that remains is to get it to you.

Click here to subscribe today.

You won't want to miss our take on the curling world, in this critical pre-Olympic season, which includes:


• The Brier: Kevin Martin’s Men are really that good

• The Scotties: Larry Wood wraps it up

• The Wrench Speaks III: One last blast from Eddie Werenich

• They Said It: an awesome finale to the 2009 season... including Bill Cosby!

• Matt Hames on drawing for the hammer

• The Capital One Grand Slam in Grand Prairie

• Vancouver Olympic Centre: open for business

• The Dominion Club Corner: The Dominion Club Championship is underway

• Larry Wood on the World Cup of Curling

• The Canada Cup: it runneth over

• The Curling News TV Guide: April 2009 (but of course)

AND MORE!

Brier: Crazy French Guys

CALGARY – Okay.

So CurlingZone Brier Blogmeistress Stina did a fine job of taking pictures of visiting international athletes faster than our Brier Bloggals.

Muddy and the Otts are two examples.

But she missed our French friends, led by skip Thomas Dufour (right, with Richard Ducroz) who went from Vancouver to Calgary and then, presumably, back to their training camp in Trois Rivieres in the lead-up to Moncton.

Last year the lads spent two entire months training in Toronto – going home for a handful of days to win the French championship before returning – which we covered in the March 2008 issue of The Curling News.

In Cowtown, these wacky guys found themselves in some kind of locker room, and proceeded to test out some kind of loony oversized curling props.

Trop de bière?

Brier: Blog Babes say Buh-Bye

by Margo Weber and Dalene Heck

[Margo says:]

Buh-Bye.

When my old friend gk contacted me to see if I’d be interested in blogging it up at the Brier, I was, like, ‘Hells Yeah!’

A whole week at the Saddledome goofing around and showering the curling world with my crazy opinions?!

Alas, reality hits. I have a couple of young ones at home and this was not possible. Enter my good friend Dalene Heck who has been nothing short of fantastic. Definitely the Brier Media Rookie of the Year! I’ll never forget Crotch Cam, Stalkergate or the crazy games we played with our new media friends.

I have managed to go to a few games, hit the Patch in style (Oh my GAWD) and send in a post now and then. I’ve met people from across the country, reconnected with old friends, ate too many chicken fingers and had way too much to drink.

gk, hope we didn’t trash up your site too much. You kinda asked for it. xoxo


[Dalene says:]

Peace. Out!

And there you have it. Despite a final substitution when Jeff Stoughton ousted Glenn Howard in Saturday’s semi-final, the 2009 Tim Hortons Brier ended as many suspected it would – with a dominating win by Alberta’s Kevin Martin. What a thrill to be at the Saddledome and watch Martin’s foursome earn their second consecutive Brier, and in front of an excited hometown crowd!

A few weeks ago, if you would have asked me what I’d be doing the week of the Brier, I would have said that I'd be catching most of the games on TV while lounging in my giant-baby-one-piece-footed-pink-camouflage-fleece-pajamas. I never would have expected to meet so many great people (including a new BFF!), take so many pictures of crotches, become a stalker, become a stalkee, do an interview in the CBC Radio studios or help pick the All-Star team.

It’s been an incredibly fun week, that ended with a weekend of exciting curling moments. While I am sad to see it all come to an end, there are many things that I am looking forward to: sleep, spending time with hubby and the kitties, detoxification, sleep, reintroducing vegetables to my diet as a replacement for pocket dawgs, sleep, catching up on all my recorded TV shows, getting back on the treadmill, and sssssllllleeeeeppppp!

Thanks to everyone who helped make this experience what it was, especially my hawt partner in crime, Margo Weber! And to our hubbies for putting up with it all (XOXO).

Brier: I say Johnny, you say Mo

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – I say Johnny, you say Mo!

Johnny!

Mo!

Johnny!

Mo!

What a crowd!

Given the complete blowout that was the final game, I’m happy to say that I stuck it out and watched Alberta’s Kevin Martin, John Morris, Marc Kennedy and Ben Hebert get to enjoy their historic Brier victory with such amazing hometown support.

And let's give a big Hells Yeah to Jeff Stoughton and his Manitoba foursome for the class act that they were in that final game. Jeff’s token spin-o-rama gave the fans one more chance to stand on their feet and salute their tremendous efforts at the end of this week.

Brier: Sorry, Jeff

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Game time, and time for my final pre-game blogpost of the 2009 Tim Hortons Brier.

Jim Brown of the Calgary Eyeopener asked me on Friday morning if I thought it was possible for any team to knock Alberta off of their record setting performance. At the time, even when there were still four other exceptional teams in the mix, I confidently answered in the negative. Kevin + John + Marc + Benny = Unbelievably Unbeatable.

My tune has not changed. Martin has won his last six matchups against Stoughton, and that winning streak isn’t going to end here either.

Since my interview on Friday, Alberta squeaked out another one from Ontario, placing them directly in the final. While they only won the 1 vs 2 game by an inch on Kevin’s final draw, I truly believe that in today's final, they will find a way to again be on the right side of that inch. They will continue doing what they have done for the past 25 games – they will always find a way to win.

This is unfortunate for Manitoba’s Jeff Stoughton, who has hit his stride in the last three games. After running the house on Quebec in the tiebreaker, Stoughton continued his own winning streak with wins over Newfoundland and then Ontario to place the Bisons in today’s final.

While these games were largely won on the strength of Stoughton’s red hot shooting (three missed semifinal draws aside!) he was also afforded many an opportunity by his opponents. Brad Gushue’s Newfoundland foursome took too long to get their heads in the game and Glenn Howard curled his worst game of the tournament.

These sorts of opportunities will not be loosely offered up by team Alberta, if at all. Where Stoughton and third Kevin Park have been streaky in their game performances, Alberta has been extremely consistent with nary a blemish to their record. If the Martin foursome let the Brier Tankard slip out of their hands due to a less than stellar performance, it will be nothing short of a catastrophic upset.

Jeff, thanks for making the playoffs exciting after a relatively dull week of curling. Sorry that you won’t be able to see it through.

Brier: KPark and KMart

by Margo Weber

CALGARY – Colour me completely surprised when I realized that Glenn Howard was not going to win that semifinal game. Who gets a four-ender in the Brier semifinal? Jeffy S – that’s who.

So now we have ex-teammies Kevin Martin and Kevin Park squaring off in the oddest final since G. Howard versus Jean-Michel Ménard in 2006.

This was not supposed to happen.

There will be a slashing today. The question is, how long will it take.

Manitoba will not leave empty handed tonight, however. The Olympic Trials (CTRS) qualifying points alone will majorly help Park and Manitoba skipper Jeff Stoughton in his bid to make the final eight in Edmonton this fall.

Maybe we should get our Pros Pick ’Em segment rolling again. Will anyone take odds on Manitoba?

I know what you’re thinking... how can she be so sure Kevin Martin is going to walk away Brier Champion again?

This is how I know.

Two words. Marc Kennedy.

Brier: The Mexican, McLovin and Babyface

CALGARY – We couldn’t say it any better than YouTube’s jujames, who asks: “What the heck is the deal with this? The TSN announcers said nothing.”

Click here to view.

Brier: Stoughty shot/blogshots

Nice shaaaawwwt from Manitoba skip Jeff Stoughton yesterday in the Page 3-4 game versus Newfoundland’s Brad Gushue, as described here.

And now we present the TSN montage complete with explanatory arrows, above. Graphic by Anil Mungal.

Compare with Glenn Howard’s shot earlier this week, located here.

Of course, you can also compare in real video, with Howard’s shot here and Stoughton’s here.

Fun fact: did you know that Stoughton is the author of a Brier blog on the CBC website?

Um, not in Calgary, but last year in Winnipeg. It includes headers like “The good, the bad, the ugly and the OK” and even the word “debacle” to explain last year’s disappointing finale.

Speaking of disappointing finales, many will be sad to miss the third installment of Alberta versus Ontario. But for Manitoba fans, a big day from their diminutive skip – and their, er, Alberta import – could give them one heckuva year to cheer, following Canadian titles from Kaitlyn Lawes in the Juniors (world finale underway this morning) and Jennifer Jones at the Scotties.

But be warned, Bison fans. Stoughton is no longer taking on The Bear. The Alberta skip has now morphed into... The Gorilla ...

Brier: Media scrumming

CALGARY – In this Facebook photo snapped by New Brunswick fan Rebecca Tremblay, we can see the Brier media scrum which followed the epic Glenn Howard versus Russ Howard (and Steve Howard) battle on Tuesday. Click to zoom in (a little).

A gaggle of major curling poobahs are indicated by number. Plus the key on-ice protagonists.

At number eight is the shoo-in for Brier Media Rookie of The Year – if they had such an award – Dalene Heck of The Curling News.

Brier Patch III: Argyle Turtles

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – If you didn’t get to see my group of argyle friends in the crowd last night, then you may have heard them rocking some tunes with their turtle whistle necklaces.

They call themselves “The Argyle Turtle Band” and were the opening act for Streetheart. At least, that’s their version of last night’s events ...

Brier: is this the best ever?

Question: could this Brier be on its way to becoming, possibly, the greatest ever?

Some guys named Stoughton and Gushue just crashed the Martin-Howard VIP access-only lounge with a scintillating display of playoff curling (CCA photo by Michael Burns).

High drama came down to a stunning conclusion when Jeff Stoughton, staring down a determined Newfoundland comeback attempt (a deuce in the seventh and then double steals in eight and nine) called and made a wild angle-raise double for two and stuck it for the win... which went to a measurement.

In a reversal of the 2005 Olympic Trials final, in which the Stoughton squad started shaking hands with the Gushues while awaiting for the golden measurement – which confirmed Gushue’s Olympic history-to-be at Turin 2006 – this time it was the Newfoundlanders who offered their hands to the Bisons, while awaiting the results of the measurement.

The Manitobans fired 86 per cent as a team compared to Newfoundland’s 83. Stoughton sizzled at 91 per cent – no doubt earning the famous five-out-of-four bonus on his last throw – while Gushue sizzled only slightly less, at 88 per cent.

The ’Tobans went completely crazy after The Shot (II) was made.

Manitoba now moves on to battle Ontario in tonight’s semifinal.

Hoo-boy! Wotta Brier!

Here’s how the live CurlingZone chat module described the action. Can anyone guess which chatter:

a) entered the chatroom just seconds after The Shot (II)?
b) is not in Calgary?
and
b) is also missing the TV coverage?

[CurlingZone Chat]: Posada has entered at 1:28 pm
[t42] 1:29 pm: They don’t believe it
[t42] 1:29 pm: they are stunned
[Donr] 1:29 pm: measure for win???
[t42] 1:29 pm: Jeff’s face
[Jetboots] 1:29 pm: woo
[t42] 1:29 pm: omg
[Posada] 1:29 pm: What's happening!!!!! Just got here Aiighhh
[t42] 1:29 pm: its mb
[t42] 1:29 pm: but NL would be stupid not to measure
[Donr] 1:29 pm: we hope lol
[Jetboots] 1:29 pm: nice shot
[Posada] 1:29 pm: WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT
[CurlingZone Chat]: hack scruber has entered at 1:29 pm
[Jetboots] 1:30 pm: not over yet
[t42] 1:30 pm: oh my -
[Posada] 1:30 pm: JB - TALK TO ME!!!
[t42] 1:30 pm: shaking hands before measure
[Jetboots] 1:30 pm: yellow
[Donr] 1:30 pm: newfies know
[t42] 1:30 pm: MB take 2 and the game with a long angle double raise take out stick
[Donr] 1:30 pm: wow
[t42] 1:30 pm: yess
[t42] 1:30 pm: That is drama
[Donr] 1:31 pm: was worth the prcie of tsn lol
[sandym] 1:31 pm: helluva shot
[t42] 1:31 pm: Jeff was sick to stomach there from the look on his face - not sure he believed he had done it
[Posada] 1:32 pm: Holy crap
[t42] 1:31 pm: they didn’t sweep it all the way down did they
[t42] 1:31 pm: had to do it on its own
[Donr] 1:31 pm: mb in tough tonight
[Donr] 1:32 pm: might require some more praying to the curling gods
[Posada] 1:33 pm: WHY AM I NOT THERE AIIGGHHARRGH *smash* *bang* *crash* YEEARRGHHHH

Brier Patch II: Stalker confrontation

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – To my pleasant surprise, all-star hottie third James Grattan (left) did not run for the hills when he learned who I was. He was aware of his “hottie” status thanks to skip Russ Howard, who actually showed him this blog!

James even offered to keep the Crotch Cam alive by promising to send other pictures, for apparently team New Brunswick has more stylin’ belt buckles in their arsenal.

And yes, that’s me in the middle. Pleased to meet ’cha!

Brier Patch I: Wild autographs

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – If you are a regular patcher, then it probably wouldn’t surprise you to know that this is only one of a few pictures I have of some wild autograph sessions.

Click to zoom in. How many sigs do you recognize?

The question is, will she ever wash her chest again?

Brier: Patching it up

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – In 2004, the following words and definitions were added to the Canadian Oxford Dictionary:

“Double-Double” - a coffee with double cream and double sugar added
“Hurry” - the curling term meaning “sweep”

I have a new challenge. If the intent of the Canadian dictionary is to accurately include staples of Canadian culture, then there currently is a glaring omission that needs to be corrected.

The dictionary includes a few definitions of the verb “patch” or “patching”, most of them having to do with repairing or mending. Applied to curling, these existing definitions would suffice to describe what most people need the morning after a good night out at the Keith’s Brier Patch at the Tim Hortons Brier.

Headaches being repaired with a bottle of Tylenol. Relationships being mended with a quick conversation: “You know I was really loaded when I said that about you last night, right? I’m sorry...”

However, the current definition obviously needs to be expanded to include the actual art of enjoying the Keith’s Brier Patch itself. The art of heading to the biggest party in Canada with 3,000 or so of your closest friends and enjoying a few cold Keith’s with your favourite curlers while being entertained by some of Canada’s best musical acts.

Some examples of the use of the word “patch” in this form are:

“Are you going patching tonight?”

“Sorry, I patched it up too good last night. Going to have to take a night off so that I can continue to patch the rest of the weekend.”

Assuming I will have to submit an official definition for consideration, I have started to make some drafts:

v. patch, patch-ing, patched

1. To partake in the extra-curricular activities offered at the Canadian Men’s Curling Championship, as sponsored by Mr. Alexander Keith at the Brier Patch.

2. To consume ridiculous amounts of alcohol and stalk favourite curlers for autographs, pictures, or to offer strategies for future games.

3. To rush the stage for Streetheart.

Perhaps #3 isn’t quite appropriate, but it is what I personally plan on doing while I “patch” it up tonight. Those boys? I’m Under Their Thumb (2:20 into the video, and it’s awesome).

For a lot of curling fans, the Brier Patch is as important to the tournament as the actual competition. Thus, I will endeavour to find out how to correct this gross oversight in the authority of our Canadian language. And until I make the official submission for review, I will continue to do as much research as possible to ensure I get the definition right. This will be a tough sacrifice, but somebody has to do it.

See you tonight...?

Brier: remove Saskatch, insert Quebec

by Margo Weber

CALGARY – At the beginning of the week, I made a prediction that Newfoundland, Manitoba and Saskatchewan would play off for the right to meet Ontario and Alberta in the playoffs.

But Quebec’s late round robin surge has more than made up for the disappointing showing by the Saskatchewan team skipped by Joel Jordison (CCA photo by Michael Burns).

Jean-Michel Ménard and crew have rattled off five wins in a row, including a biggie over Ontario’s Glenn Howard.

Menard is a previous Brier champion but hey – so was everyone else. Now he plays Jeff Stoughton’s Manitoba team in a tiebreaker this afternoon.

START, stupid game! I’m going through withdrawl! Ah, perhaps I can get something outside of curling accomplished this morning. BTW, my husband is looking forward to having me back next week.

This from today’s Calgary Sun:

Saskatchewan coach Ron Meyers and fifth man Rod Montgomery showed up for last night’s game against Newfoundland/Labrador wearing paper bags over their heads.

Other than Sask (otherwise known as Saskatch) have there been any other surprises at this year’s Tim Horton’s Brier?... I mean other than the fact that I apparently can consume three drinks at once?... Yawnsies...

However, I will be watching the TSN telecast this afternoon while my two- year-old chants “Manitoba!”. NO idea why he’s doing that. I need to start brainwashing him to chant “Let’s Go Grey Slacks!” or at least “Let’s Go White Belts!”

Brier: There Is Beer

[Editor’s Note: Superstar TCN Blogger Dalene Heck will appear on CBC Radio’s Calgary Eyeopener with host Jim Brown at approximately 6:22 am local time tomorrow, Friday March 13. Dalene will talk about the Tim Hortons Brier, set up the playoff picture and possibly describe her Keith’s Patch adventures from the previous evening. Hoo-wah. Tune in to 99.1 FM, 1010 AM or via the internet from anywhere ... ]

by Dalene Heck

CALGARY – Thursday night at the Brier. A weird buzz overall. Craziness. Last-minute wrestling for a playoff spot. Standing ovations from the crowd (CCA photo by Michael Burns) to those who are headed home. It’s electric.

And, of course, there is beer.

Every day, the event daily Tankard Times churns out profiles on different players. I can’t help but question whether some of the players allow their friends to complete their forms for fun, or perhaps they have ingested a few wobbly pops before putting pen to paper?

Here are a few that have gotten me wondering…

• Nova Scotia third Bruce Lohnes’ nickname is apparently Juicy Brucey. I’m not sure I’d be advertising that little fun fact myself.

• New Brunswick third James Grattan described himself as “sexy”. While I can’t disagree with him (Hello? All star HOT third!) I never pegged him as the narcissistic type.

• The British Columbia team obviously had fun with their profiles. Skip Sean Geall’s profile stated that he loves curling because “there is beer”. Second Kevin Reckseidler described himself as “classy, gassy and sassy”, while lead Mark Olson is “huggable and kissable”. However, third Brent Pierce apparently wasn’t a part of this game as his profile is lacking some pizzazz!

• When asked why he loves curling, Jamie Koe of The Territories responded with: “Two words, The Patch”. I have to say that I believe my good friend JK completed his profile with all honesty. That is the JK we know and love.

PS: This will officially be my last mention of James Grattan. I can smell the restraining order…