Monday, April 06, 2009

Ford World Curling: Hotties part I

by Katja Kiiskinen

MONCTON – Today the bikinis and the beach towel were no longer needed, but in hope of some Caribbean atmosphere later in the evening I did bring a bottle of piña colada.

The drop in the air temperature is definitely good news for the players, and the ice. When asked about the condistions after Saturday’s final draw, Finland’s second player Jani Sullanmaa seemed slightly miffed when he stated: “Well, gimme a f***ing shovel and I’ll sweep.” I took it to mean there was a bit of frost.

Now to the really important things – hot players! After careful consideration, the jury has chosen the candidates for the “Hottest Player of Worlds 2009”. If you disagree with our choices, then I can’t really help you. No, but seriously, if you are adamant that there is an impossibly gorgeous and charismatic player who didn’t make it to our list, you can vote for him and we may consider your point – if it is well argued.

It is necessary to note that I personally was struggling with the choice because there is such an abundance of charismatic men on the ice. So, players, if you are not on our list, it’s all gk’s fault.

In my opinion, we ladies, as the smarter sex (just admit it, boys) look beyond the first impression. Whereas men would choose their candidates based on the tightest pants and the best sports bra, we ladies consider various different factors, such as charisma, eyes, smile, tightest pants and the best sports bra.

To be fair, we have chosen one player from each country. Today we will introduce the first six candidates and the rest will follow in tomorrow’s blog post.

Click on the photo montage above (featuring CCA images from Michael Burns) to view the pics a little larger.

And, the first six nominees are:


In case you were wondering, the looker with the poetic beard is Jiri Snitil, the chief of the Czech team.

Besides his curling abilities – and his unfailing devotion to the sport – this charismatic skip is also an excellent icemaker.


Our chinese piece of hot stuff is second man Xiaoming Xu. He’s got some spiky fuzz atop his head and some sass in his smile. Some of you might also remember this talented player from the Continental Cup 2008 world team.


Perhaps a little unsurprisingly, our option for the Canadian hunk is John Morris.

Mentioning his occupation would be unfair towards the rest of the guys, since it is one of those jobs that seem to give women all sorts of ideas.

In fact, Johnny Mo may have such an advantage over the field, we should find and use an unflattering photo. We’ll leave it to gk to try and post something that paints the normal JMo portrait in a different light.

How did he do, folks?


My personal choice for the Finnish representative would naturally be Kalle Kiiskinen, because he is just the bestest person in the whole wide world.

However, the idea of complimenting his fanny seemed somehow disturbing, so we decided to go with another spud of a man: Teemu Salo.

This Olympic medallist is known for being “cool” enough to wear a toque in any playing conditions.


Le Stud of the tournament is definitely Thomas Dufour, the long-time skip of the French team. He has been wooing the European crowds already for years, so it’s about time to introduce him to a wider audience.

He is also a ski instructor, in the beautiful snow-capped mountains of Chamonix. Ooh la la.


Our choice for the Danish lion man is the legendary Ulrik Schmidt. The veteran, who was off the ice and merely coaching this team two years ago, will definitely be the number one choice for the more mature female crowd.

Be sure to cast your ballot and check out the remaining six tomorrow! You can also have more than one favourite...


Lisa said...

You missed:

David Murdoch - um, hello, accent!!


Thomas Ulsrud - I think it's the hair that does it for me?!

Unknown said...

Ewan MacDonald! I love the bald guys!